a journal

These are little random things from my week that I jotted down when I had a minute.
  • ruby has taken to running into her room and slamming the door shut. already??
  • this is super cool
  • I was having a hard time remembering my reusable bags when I went shopping and my friend Heidi told me she leaves hers right on the front seat of her van. Brilliant! I went one step further and told James I wanted to use them all the time so now he will remind me, too. (he's got a great memory) (yesterday I actually forgot them on the front seat of the van, he remembered, and we went out and got them) (update! I went shopping last night and remembered them! But I didn't have nearly enough so I got paper for the rest.)
  • I am having periods of insane irritability these last 2 days but thankfully it passes as quickly as it comes on. (pms) Yesterday morning Patrick hollered down to me, asking if James had any clean socks. I shrieked back at him, "I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING!!!!!" Do you have any idea how many years I will hear that line repeated back to me? He loves when I act like a maniac.
  • We all are loving this book. It's so fun to read and we can't wait to make some bee-bim bop, minus the eggs.
  • Our little village is going to have a farmer's market this summer! I am so happy!
  • This afternoon, day 3 of no tv, got a little hairy. I have no problem with the tv, in moderation, but I can already see that I use it to problem solve sometimes when it's not really necessary. These kids, they don't need a whole lot. Just the suggestion of a book or different toy will get Ruby off her Blue's Clues rampage in about 5 seconds. I think I'm making myself sound like I stuck them in front of the TV whenever they whined and I really didn't...except for sometimes. (like dinner making time) So, at the end of day 3 these are the things I've noticed: They play more together because, well, they have more time to. They average about 50% playing with 50% squabbling and while it's annoying to listen to, I do think it's good for them to learn how to work stuff out together. I don't feel any more stressed. I do have less time to blog/read blogs without beating a child off of me but the blogging myself is what I would miss the most. I have noticed on other days where the TV doesn't come on at all (because we do have them from time to time) that things seem calmer. I think what it is is that there isn't this mad rush of getting to me when they're done watching. I think on some level they realize they are separated from me during that 24 minutes and as soon as the show is over they are clamoring for my attention. I hate that sudden rush of MOM, MOM, MOM. I guess I'll stop now. I'm tired and emotional and do tend to compose elaborate theories about my children's actions that I then promptly forget about. Who knows for sure why they do most of what they do? All I know is that this isn't so bad. And I love those two so much.
  • Today Ruby dropped a jar of spaghetti sauce on her toe. Later this afternoon I noticed it was pretty black and blue and pointed it out to James. Aw, poor Ruby, I said. James gave me his saddest sympathetic face and said, "Oh. Poor Ruby. Looks like she's going to die." hahahhahahahhaha, he is so funny. (he was joking)
  • Our babysitter is coming over Saturday night and we're going to have her put Ruby to bed. I have no idea if she'll go for it...it's always been Patrick or I. I also asked Kelsey about coming one day a week this summer and she said she'd love to. I'm thinking Wednesdays from 11-4. 5 hours alone, during the week? really? I was thinking I should have her come during the morning, when the kids are happier, but I really like to be home in the morning and would enjoy the afternoon off more. I felt bad leaving her the harder part of the day but my friends said I was crazy. Let the babysitter have them then, they hollered, they'll be better for her anyways. Probably true. Smart friends, I've got.
  • I am so glad tomorrow is Friday and we have absolutely nothing we have to do. I find myself actually looking forward to preschool ending so I will have a whole weeks' worth of days with nothing I have to do. I think I might have a hard time when life gets busier. I'm sure I'll adapt but I want to enjoy this time now as it is passing quickly.
  • This afternoon was difficult because I was so tired and just wanted to nap and James wouldn't leave me alone and I let him keep needling me, instead of dealing with it, until I snapped. Then he was in his room crying, "You really hurt my feelings, mom." Oh, man. So I apologized for yelling and told him next time I'll just lock him in his room a lot sooner and won't yell. He agreed that that sounded like a good plan. We read some books, I had some iced coffee, and life continued as normal until Patrick got home.
  • Speaking of Patrick, holy cow is he working a lot this week. He comes home exhausted, eats, plays with the kids for a while, puts James to bed, falls asleep with him, sleeps for an hour, gets up, goes downstairs and keeps working until 2,3,4am. He does come up to see me or I go down and see him but it's not like usual. I miss him and am secretly mad at him for not taking better care of himself but I know that my lecturing does NOTHING (due to many, many failed attempts over the last 12 years) except make him mad so I try to keep this to myself. All I can really do is pray that he figures out what he needs to and that this will let up soon. It always does, but it's so hard in the meantime. Last night he showed me what he's working on and it is pretty cool. A while ago he made this thing called a pre-amplifier. (all I know is it amplifies images) Now he's writing a program that will allow the pre-amp to talk to 2 other machines and you can control all of it from your computer. Pretty amazing stuff. So then I told him how I moved all the half eaten bags of frozen fruit & veggies into the freezer door so now they don't fall out and I have room on the shelves for all the meat I bought. We are equally paired, he and I.
xoxo

Comments

  1. That babysitter idea is ACES.

    And who would have thought that we could just MOVE the frozen veggies so they don't fall on our feet?

    I hope Ruby's little foot is okay.
    (That WAS pretty funny.)

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  2. I hear you on the can't-nag-a-man bit. It just doesn't work. I wish John was more aware of his habits, but it's in his hands alone. Aargh.

    Good for you going TVless- we have our good and bad days, but I find she's adapted to making up her own fun, and she never asks anymore, which is great. It was 100% for me, i'll admit- just for a break. And I may be bringing it back in July, ha!

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  3. I know, moving those veggies kept me from going off the deep end every time I opened the freezer door.

    :)

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  4. Enjoyed your journal. :)
    Hope the babysitter went well yesterday. I say try summer afternoons and see how that goes, why not? If it's crazed, then switch.

    I sputtered at the comparison of writing programs to moving frozen veggies. HeeHee!

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