oh crap

Do any of you ever start thinking too much about why you do or don't get lots of comments? I know why I don't comment that often...because I have 1,000,000 other things to do. So I know that's why everyone else probably doesn't either. But sometimes that is a bummer, you know? Do you know? Am I the only one who is ever insecure about this? I am mostly totally behind my personal stance that this is first and foremost for ME, no matter who reads it. That is true, so true, but still...

I feel like such a teenager sometimes. I actually usually feel like I get quite a few comments, and I love every one of them. (and I especially love that some of my real life friends read here now and even comment sometimes!) But then I feel bad if I don't go comment elsewhere for a while but then don't want to comment just to get one back. (I've never played that game, btw, just don't want to start)

So, this is kind of a dumb post and this will pass. I've gone through it before but have never mentioned it. Just suffered silently. hahahahaha. This is not a plea for comments. I do not feel, for me, that comments are a way of me getting paid for my blogging. (just read this somewhere, can't remember where, and don't think it's dumb or anything...just not how I feel.) I guess I especially wonder why, if I comment somewhere new a few times, that blogger doesn't even stop back and say hey to me. That kind of bothers me. Or I wonder if they did stop back and just thought I was too dumb or trashy or something, with all my talk of kids peeing on the floor and biting me.

I tend to be drawn to a lot of the, excuse my big stereotype here, earth mother blogs. And I am not an earth mother. So I guess I get that. sigh. It's feels so high school...wanting the "cool kids" to like me.

I am tempted to delete this but what the heck. I will get back to my regularly scheduled blogging about myself tomorrow. And that reminds me, while I'm baring it all. Recently a friend said something about another friend and how all she talks about is herself and her child. I kind of gulped because, um, that's what this blog is like! It took me a long time to tell my real life friends about this place because I didn't want to be like, "Hey! Come and read about ME and MY KIDS!" They see me all the time and pretty much know all of this. But little by little, they found out and have been so supportive of it. I think all of us adore our kids and all the cute little crap that they do and maybe this is tolerable to them because I'm (hopefully) not all about me in real life. Except sometimes, we all have our days. So, an extra thank you and hug to my friends. You guys are awesome.

Okay. So you know what? I feel a little better and less insecure already. I hope I don't regret this in the morning. xoxo

(boy, I haven't said that in a while.)

HAHAHAHAHA, I am so kidding. back to G rated now....

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