the one where she is cracking up a bit

(raising his arm when he heard the sound)

(waiting for his shots)
James' appt. went really well yesterday. Except his hearing wasn't so hot (I could have told them that) but they think it's just major wax so we have some flushing to do. It was fun (for a doctor visit) because both kids were really good, even with a long wait, and our doctor asked James a lot of questions this time, instead of asking me all of them. I loved hearing his answers to what he eats for meals (well, it's usually different, he said. score one for mama) (which I quickly lost when he said he'd had chocolate cereal for breakfast) (which I'd like to tell you (meaning my mother) was chocolate shredded mini wheats but didn't tell doc so as not appear obviously insecure with my parenting choices), likes to do at school (build obstacle courses), what games he likes to play (he left out the fact that he is a little cheat/sore loser but don't we all like to look our best for the dr?), etc. He had to get 4 shots and screamed pretty loud but recovered quickly. (oreos) He turned down their offer of a free stuffed monkey and politely asked if they had a prize box that he could look through himself. haha. Ruby was showing off with her best manners (at least I know they're in there) and charming everyone.


This has been a strange week. I'm super emotional and lots of things (good & bad) are making me feel weepy. I think I've just had a lot of little things (and some not so little) on my mind and it's gotten to me a bit. I had to make a big decision about a possible group vacation next year (agreed then declined) which led to some thinking about our family and if we are finished adding to it. (unknown, but probably) I'll be honest and say I'm feeling good body wise (exercising daily and loving that) but looking rough in the face. I took some pictures of myself in bright sunlight last weekend, with no make up, and they were quite startling. I've always thought I was fairly cute (not being vain, just normally good with how I look) (not always including body, mind you) but I saw how I am AGING. For the first real time, I saw that. And it kind of punched me in the gut. I went out the other night and bought eye cream and hair dye. I cried to Patrick that I was old and ugly and he did as he was supposed to and assured me that I am neither and pinched my bum. (although he did ask if I'd be dying my hair today. hmmmm.) See?? What a total mess I am. (cue violins) sigh.

I kind of hated to write all of this but needed to get it out, too. I think most of you understand how sometimes you just have to dump it all out, rifle through it, and see what you've actually got.

In other news, I'm glad it's Friday, glad it's going to be beautiful this afternoon & tomorrow...can't wait to get outside.

Have a good weekend and I'll see you back here next week! with new hair color and rejuvenated eye sockets!



  1. Oh my, I have been having some of the same things on my mind! Where did these wrinkles come from? When did my hair get so dark and how did I get matching under eye circles? I think summer will help some, don't you? I have some of those oily ear drops to get the wax out if you need some . . .Willah had the same problem. It's gross.

  2. Oh I hear you on those surprise mirror moments--they can hit hard, and can be hard to shake (at least for me).

    Glad the Dr. visit went well--his answers were funny!

  3. It's hard to suddenly look in the mirror and pay attention. Have I mentioned that I have white hair? I do, and I'm, sort of, not really old enough to have a whole head of white hair. Very emotional. Color your hair. Put on some eye pencil. Study your face and see how beautiful it is.

    IT IS.

  4. ((((Stephanie)))) It's easy to lose sight of yourself once you have kids. You look in the mirror one day and have no idea who you are. Been there, done that, will be there again. (And soon if I dont get a haircut. I havent had one again since like May. Sigh.)

    About this ear thing, how are you flushing them? I always mean to ask the ped about that b/c I swear Jack says what way too much, but Jack is NOT an angel when we are in there and I always feel like I am 12 seconds from losing my mind and forget the damn ears.

  5. Oh yes, share how you clean his ears!

    And I think you're adorable :)

  6. aww Steph, you are so beautiful!! I remember the first time I noticed I had wrinkles...especially the ones around my eyes, that was hard. but you know, now I feel I would rather have the wrinkles and be who I am today than go back to being 20 with the smooth skin. They are kind of my badge of honor that says..."yeah, I am older, but I've been through some stuff and I am wiser and stronger for it". And the laugh lines just show how much joy I have had in my life from all the smiling and laughng!

  7. Love Ruby's shirt, and that she's a girl loving LM! GO TOMBOYS! I also think James' legs look super looooong in that shot of him waiting for his shots. I always feel a little sneaky taking pics in the exam room, heh, heh!

    It is so hard to be good with our bodies--I think it is a universal challenge for women. About a year out from having James I felt like I had never looked better and than WHAM preggo! I am struggling with my 2nd time around mommy pooch, but I hope to continue to work it away, little by little. Love the part about how your hubby pinched your butt. That's a GOOD MAN!!! Chin up and feel better. This too shall pass.


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