the pretty good then very bad then good again day

Yesterday was a pretty good day for the most part.  I thought I had written James' dr. appt. down wrong but then found out I hadn't.  I sold a pair of pricey shoes.  James' appt. went well and we didn't die in the rainstorm on the way there.  My friend Zoe called and said she had a heart rate monitor I could borrow.  (!!) I stuck to our best routine and we did homework right after school & snack and it went smoothly.  The house stayed picked up.  I got the bills paid.  I exercised and ate right.  Lots of good stuff, right? 

And then dinner time came and it all went to hell.  Basically OVER ONE LITTLE GIRL and one worn out mama.  I was so exhausted when it was over that I went and laid down and fell asleep.  I woke up (like 10 minutes later) and Patrick was home (we ate late...never a good idea) and he had closed the door so I could rest.  Nicky came in a minute later to cuddle/smother me and I laid there just feeling bad and wanting to eat a cake.  I had forced James to try some ranch dip (long story) and felt really bad about that, too.  I was considering not letting Ruby sit at the table during meals EVER AGAIN! but that doesn't feel right, either.  I KNOW what works with her but sometimes what works just takes too much energy.  Sometimes I just wish she'd fricking eat.  (Oh yeah, and Nicky said "fricking" yesterday.  bad mom.)  So, I finally rallied (aka was sick of Nicky's boogery face on mine)  (sorry Nicky) and went and found James.  We hugged it out and I apologized.  Next I found Ruby and she immediately told me she was thinking about dinner time, too, and what she would be willing to do.  She would try mashed potatoes and ketchup and even bananas!  She suggested she pick a couple of meals a week and then James and I pick the rest and she will try them and then eat sunbutter and fruit/veggies if she doesn't like them.  (which is our usual plan but sometimes I get bitter about getting the sunbutter out.  I never said I was perfect.  :)  )  She understands if she complains about the food then she will have to leave the table.  (Nicky eats so much worse when she is around which really makes me mad.)  Anyways, it was a good discussion and we obviously needed to regroup but I hate when that happens.  I told myself I should focus on how it's been pretty good for a while, not one bad night.  I just hate when I get so mad.  I didn't even really yell but they could tell I was REALLY wanting to yell.  Same thing, right?  sigh.  Moving on.

I am also hating having all of this consignment sale stuff hanging over me.  I got everything ready to be priced and organized by price over the weekend, which was a big job, but hadn't started pricing yet like I told myself I would.  So I was stressed about that.  I am so thankful that Patrick was so sweet to me last night.  He gave me a really nice hug and got everyone ready for bed and then distracted Nicky and got him to bed, which is usually my job.  I gathered all of my stuff and got 100 items priced!  Yay!  Only 600+ to go!  :)  It didn't take me that long, though, and it was good for me to see that and just get started.  Nicky is sick today (he was yesterday afternoon, too) so I'm going to plant myself on the couch by him and get some more done. 

So yesterday started out good, got really creepy, but ended well.  I am so thankful for forgiveness and grace and fresh starts. 

And tonight we are having homemade chicken noodle soup for dinner because everyone likes it.

Anyone else have a picky eater?  Anyone else feel exhausted by parenting sometimes?   :)   

Thanks for listening.



  1. Hi Cuz,
    Exhausted by parenting sometimes...YES!!!! Eden is so adorable but she NEVER STOPS TALKING and she is really busy and testing if I mean what I say all day. My problem is getting out the door. She follows me around and undoes everything I do. Pulling things out of the diaper bag, messing with Jude in his car seat, unzipping her jacket. Sometimes she is happy and just repeats everything I say and sometimes she is fussing. Anyway, I am always flustered and sweating by the time we are in the van. I am contemplating putting on a little Sesame Street clip in these situations but we vowed to do no screens til after 2. Is that dumb? Am I going to lose my mind? Sleep deprivation is also exacerbating everything. Jude is basically a dream baby, but sleeps all day and wants to chill with me at night. Thanks for listening :) Have you ever read a blog called Neon Fresh? I think it's funny. Love you, Cousintine


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